Gaijin on a Plane!
So here I am...I'm traveling all the way across the world into a land completely foreign to me with (to my standards) only a very loose grasp of the basics of the language, I'm going to be force fed food that consist of animals I've never even seen and I have a hunch that 9 times out of 10 I'll gag on it, I'm going to be thrown into an extremely high population area when I've only known cow-towns my entire life, I'm going to get helplessly lost in a complex subway system and probably have to call my embassy to have someone assist me home, and most of all I'm going to be put into the care of a host family that, depending on their standards, can potentially make my life a servitude to them for the next year.
All this will be thrown at me in the next 2 weeks of my life and yet none of it really worries me at all. Want to know why? Because I'm too preoccupied with being scared of the damn flight over.
So I must admit, I'm not a very keen person when it comes to flying, or heights for that matter. The last time I flew I was about 4 years old and don't remember anything except crying that my mother was going to be left behind in a layover when she went to the terminal to get some peanuts or something. Since then my knowledge about planes has been the ever informational and reliable mass media. The only time I've really heard anything about planes (with the exception of Tom Hanks getting locked away in an airport for ages in "The Terminal") has been when they crash or blow up. So needless to say, I'm a little on edge.
Things have only gotten worse on my nerves in the past couple weeks. I think it all started with when my dad practically forced me to watch a series on the Discovery channel called "Moments Before Disaster." In this particular episode, it went into detail describing the process of how a 747's fuel tank turns into an airborne bomb. Soon after that, one thing after another started a barrage on my reserves on the safeties of flying. The whole England terrorist plot thing shook up things to a height they haven't been since September 11th, making me wonder if I'm going to have to sit on my plane without my MP3 player or laptop for the whole 19 hour flight (or however long it takes the plane to crash before that).
At this point I was telling myself that at least I'll be on a smaller plane for the first part of my flight from Texas till my Michigan layover, and those planes are usually safer, right? Well some act of god just decided to blow those beliefs out of the water as there was a plane crash in Kentucky that killed 49 people just the other day. Whenever I mention things like this to people though, I always get the same response. "Plane crashes are rare" and "It almost never happens." Well I'm sorry to break it to you people. As your going down and staring death in the eyes, telling yourself that it almost never happens isn't a very effective.
As if I wasn't scared enough of the planes at this point by all these events the mother of them all has to hit me... the release of "Snakes on a Plane." I hate snakes more then I do planes I must admit, but the thought of having to deal with both at the same time is something I could have lived without. I honestly don't know how to handle that situation, even after watching the movie. I don't have the kick boxing skills or the hairspray/lighter combo that was used to win the day in the movie, so does that mean I'm just screwed in this situation? Worst of all, I'm pretty sure Samuel L. won't be found in the middle of a flight going to Japan. I mean, honestly, those people where done for if they didn't have Mr. Jackson fighting on their side, and I'm a poor imitation if the need arises. And I just can't imagine any of the Japanese business men returning home would have the....fortitude to step up and take his place.
Honestly...the movie would have turned out completely different if the cast looked a little something like this.
All this will be thrown at me in the next 2 weeks of my life and yet none of it really worries me at all. Want to know why? Because I'm too preoccupied with being scared of the damn flight over.
So I must admit, I'm not a very keen person when it comes to flying, or heights for that matter. The last time I flew I was about 4 years old and don't remember anything except crying that my mother was going to be left behind in a layover when she went to the terminal to get some peanuts or something. Since then my knowledge about planes has been the ever informational and reliable mass media. The only time I've really heard anything about planes (with the exception of Tom Hanks getting locked away in an airport for ages in "The Terminal") has been when they crash or blow up. So needless to say, I'm a little on edge.
Things have only gotten worse on my nerves in the past couple weeks. I think it all started with when my dad practically forced me to watch a series on the Discovery channel called "Moments Before Disaster." In this particular episode, it went into detail describing the process of how a 747's fuel tank turns into an airborne bomb. Soon after that, one thing after another started a barrage on my reserves on the safeties of flying. The whole England terrorist plot thing shook up things to a height they haven't been since September 11th, making me wonder if I'm going to have to sit on my plane without my MP3 player or laptop for the whole 19 hour flight (or however long it takes the plane to crash before that).
At this point I was telling myself that at least I'll be on a smaller plane for the first part of my flight from Texas till my Michigan layover, and those planes are usually safer, right? Well some act of god just decided to blow those beliefs out of the water as there was a plane crash in Kentucky that killed 49 people just the other day. Whenever I mention things like this to people though, I always get the same response. "Plane crashes are rare" and "It almost never happens." Well I'm sorry to break it to you people. As your going down and staring death in the eyes, telling yourself that it almost never happens isn't a very effective.
As if I wasn't scared enough of the planes at this point by all these events the mother of them all has to hit me... the release of "Snakes on a Plane." I hate snakes more then I do planes I must admit, but the thought of having to deal with both at the same time is something I could have lived without. I honestly don't know how to handle that situation, even after watching the movie. I don't have the kick boxing skills or the hairspray/lighter combo that was used to win the day in the movie, so does that mean I'm just screwed in this situation? Worst of all, I'm pretty sure Samuel L. won't be found in the middle of a flight going to Japan. I mean, honestly, those people where done for if they didn't have Mr. Jackson fighting on their side, and I'm a poor imitation if the need arises. And I just can't imagine any of the Japanese business men returning home would have the....fortitude to step up and take his place.
Honestly...the movie would have turned out completely different if the cast looked a little something like this.
posted by BrookieDragon at 10:36 PM
3 Comments:
Hey Brookie!
Well, I'll be one of those people that are going to tell you not to worry about your flight. Rather than trying to disavow plan crashes - accept them. But, consider the fact that there is a much higher percentage of car accidents (especially fatal accidents) than there are plane crashes.
Hang in there, and you'll get over there just fine!
Alternatively, you can always drug yourself up right when you get on the final leg and you'll sleep the entire way. :-)
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Listen to the Jurassic Park theme, or better yet something from the original Star Wars trilogy. It helps.
Man, realize that the whole Japan thing is "big and scary" for a reason -- the profound things always are. Anytime you are not tense, afraid, or in constant doubt of yourself, then it almost isn't worth doing.
You think I was scared when I offered the man at KFC twenty bucks and got all the chicken before closing, then proceeded to eat it all? Yes, I was scared, but it all pays off in the end.
They let you have MP3 players, and the guy next to me had a laptop. However, put it in the carry-on bag and let them figure it out for themselves when it gets X-rayed.
Hopefully you don't have as much trouble getting into Japan as you did A&M!
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